It's autumn, but I feel winter in my heart. I feel so cold and unable to love, empathize, or even identify my emotions one at a time. My head is a mess: I've got so much stuff going on in my head that I can't even think of one single thing. I don't even understand myself anymore. I thought I knew me, but I realized you maybe knew me better than I did.
If you could only even barely imagine how much I'm missing you, I guess you would feel a little bit better. So many years have gone by so fast and I'm feeling lost in the void right now, as if the things which I gained so hard until now are gone forever and will never come back.
I feel a huge pain and I'm afraid I'm going to drown in it at a point of no return.
I don't even know what would make me feel better at the moment. I am standing still, the world is too overwhelming for me and it is all just getting too much. I would need to stop and stare at myself, I would need to try and get to know myself, or perhaps maybe just taking a break from everything and everybody would be the perfect choice.
I hope I won't freeze to death when winter will finally come.

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